There are only two times a year when I can walk into a Whole Foods and not be immediately angered by shoppers pushing carts into me because they’re on their cell phones asking their spouses what to buy: Gala Apple season and Blood Orange season.
Oranges are my f*cking favorite. Not favorite fruit, just simply my favorite. And you can ask those who are close to me and they’ll tell you that I’m the best at picking oranges – it’s just a skill I was born with, sorry! Last week, there was a display of Cara Cara oranges – THE ORANGE SO NICE, THEY NAMED IT TWICE – which have a pinkish center and are soooo good. I knew that it was only a matter of time before the Blood Oranges came out, because you better effin’ believe I follow the seasons.
I love the taste and scent of oranges. I’m not a huge fan of orange juice, though. One time my dad told me that Gene Simmons patented the word “OJ,” so I never said it because I was afraid it would summon his presence – like saying “Beetlejuice” three times or something. Turns out it was a nasty rumor spread by Ronnie James Dio (may he rest in peace).
So, yesterday I went into Whole Foods and there was a big pile of deliciously plump Blood Oranges, and I bought four – just to test the waters, you know. I just ate one now and I feel like a new woman.
This has been me geeking out about oranges for a moment. Thank you and you’re welcome.
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I would like to point out that I first-hand experience Jenn Schiffer’s love for oranges via Blue Moon pitcher.
Everyone knows that if you buy the pitcher of Blue Moon, you get to eat all the orange slices. It’s common knowledge, my friend!